I'm literally in tears right now. I thought I would be fine about this but I'm not. I'm not fucking fine with this.
My school is putting on Grease for our Musical and I love Grease. Like it's my favourite musical of all time. My dream role has always been Sandy, and since we're doing it at school I thought this could be my chance since I'm not planning on pursuing acting. I worked really hard on my audition, and apparently did a great job on it. I had shown her during Romeo and Juliet that I was a hard worker, willing to do anything that was asked of me and god dammit I was going to do a hell of a good job.
Unfortunately, one of the girls who was Juliet gets to be Sandy. Now I wouldn't be so angry about this if she hadn't already been a lead in two plays before this. Also, she has the wrong voice type for Sandy. She's mega talented and all and I love her to bits, but she's not Sandy. She's a favourite.
Same with our Danny, who's played by the guy who played Romeo. He's a favourite, so he got the role. He I can understand because he's our only grade 12 guy, but he's not badass enough for the role.
My drama teacher basically just ignored so much talent for the sake of her two favourites. Even my mom is pissed. And my mom doesn't give a fuck about me being in drama. Even she recognizes when something is so unjust and unfair.
And the worst thing for me that I have medium sized speaking role. And I'm not even a fucking pink lady. I'm the cheerleader. I don't even get to sing. And I'm a singer and it sucks.
I mean, at least it's better than the few lines I had in Romeo and Juliet. But still.
6 years if acting and what's come out of it? Minor roles and silent roles.
I don't know. It would be nice for once to be recognized for an actress. To be given some credit for what I've worked so hard to achieve.
14 years of singing lessons to never be given one solo? Bullshit. Unless I've been lied to my entire fucking life, I can sing.
You know what?
I just don't want to just be the girl who plays the flute anymore. But lately I'm beginning to think it's the only thing I'm good at anymore.